What is everyone up to?

[Waspman]

For the tanks and stuff, did you look at/outlined real tanks? Because they look pretty realistic, other than the Tri-Tank of course.

[Fayde]

No, i actually just did it in Illustrator without much reference. I did have to find a couple pictures for the Artillery because I didn't want the Artillery to be just gun mounted tri-pods. But I didn't trace them or anything, just got ideas.
The only thing I really "traced" were both Infantry units, which I did sketches of on paper, but they were my drawings to begin with.. so yeah...
I'm glad they look realistic! That makes teh Josh happy...

[Fayde]

I just read an awesome signature from a forum-based RPG site (not one I go to, just poking around), and saw this awesome sig that, for some reason, made me giggle for several minutes...

"Last night i lay in bed looking up at the stars and thought to myself, 'where the heck is the ceiling?"'

[Fayde]

Sorry I have been out of touch this week. I have had a very VERY hectic weekend, and I am just now sitting down at my computer for longer than a few minutes and relaxing. I have kept you all in my thoughts, but man we've been crazy busy this weekend.

First, we went to Church on Sunday, which as a big deal as it's Christmas time, and went directly to the woods and cut down our Christmas Tree (which is seriously huge).
That night, we had a late Thanksgiving dinner and had some family time.
Monday morning Melissa had to go to school and I cleaned so we could decorate that night. We didn't. We spent the remainder of the day shopping and running around like crazy until around 7 or so, then I tried to put up the Christmas Tree.... Yeah.... WAY to big, so I had to chop a bunch of it up, and tried to redo it. Turns out it was a half-inch off from the bottom of the tree stand and I had to remove some bottom branches, which took a while (unscrewing it, taking out side and chopping it up.
Of course by this time we were both dead tired and went to bed by 11pm.
This morning we both had a meeting at school so we could register for classes for Winter quarter. Afterward we finished cleaning the house (cause it got dirty again... somehow), and then finally decorated, put the monster tree up and got the house lit up with lights and goodness. Of course, this took a long time too, so we are finally done and dead to the world. We'll probably be in bed shortly (almost 10pm).

Anyway, I really looked forward to talking to everyone and playing a game or two this week, but it's not going to happen. I have to go to work tomorrow and we got a new kid, so this week is going to be crazy at work as well. Busy Busy Busy Busy... busy..................... busy........ *head falls on keyboard*

[Fayde]

WHY AM I STILL AWAKE AT 1 IN THE MORNING WHEN I HAVE TO GET UP AT 645 AND WORK FOR 14 HOURS TOMORROW!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!

[Waspman]

Lost track of time?
Man, you're going to be tired..

[Fayde]

I was so very tired.... But I thrive on it, we stayed up till almost 2 Saturday night shopping. >: )

[Fayde]

I am currently drinking some deeply flavorful home-made iced coffee, eatting a 85% dark chocolate bar that my wife got me for Christmas (which basically tastes like baking coco condensed into a bar. yum!), using Photoshop on 1 monitor, listening to 18 Horsepower and posting on BlueBridge on another monitor.

I win the last level.

Now all I need is to be playing SoaSE with you guys and I will beat the last boss.

[Fayde]

BLARG!! Ok, so I started back up with school and already feel completely overwhelmed. Not so much because of school, it's just a culture shock. It's just the first couple of days, so I'll get through that easily.
No, it's because I have to go out and get a really neat, cool hobby like board gaming, and no. Nope. No gaming for Josh. Not only is every one up here not up for gaming unless it's in front of a screen, but they seem to have a hard time wrapping themselves around a simple game of poker, let alone a game like Battletech, Race for the Galaxy, or even RISK. I recently was given a copy of Munchkin, which is a parody/comedy card game based on D&D. It's SUPER simple and is literally made up of totally your Level + item bonuses, against monster Level. EASY. Yet, I have yet to play it. It's a bit to adult humorish to play with the boys I work with, so no go there.
The rest of my gaming is done with 10 YEAR OLD BOYS!!!!!! Not to mention that they are DYSFUNCTIONAL 10 YEAR OLD BOYS!!!!!!!!!! Game of Battletech? Fun, but STRESSFUL. It ends up being worth it in the end for the expression on their faces when a Mech of mine is blasted in the first turn by a freak ammo explosion, but it's not actually playing the game.

So, you know VASSAL? That online game program? Well I sort of found out how to use it? Easy? Nope. Can I make my own games on it? Sure... With a degree in programing and game design along with someone holding my hand the whole time. On top of this, it's just as complex a program to use as it is to teach someone the games themselves, if not, more so.

Thanks to Jay and Megamek, I really get out a lot of steam and actually feel like I am getting some of my urges out, but still. Half the reason I like board games is because you get to interact with the people your playing with, and not just typing on a keyboard. You actually get to HOLD something in your hand. You get to use more than just 1 or 2 senses when playing (smell, touch, see, hear, not so much taste... unless your weird...), rather than just see and sometimes hear.
Still, playing Megamek with Jay is great, and I do appreciate playing it. I am extremely happy that the game even exists, let alone getting to play it with Jay.

I'm just bowing steam. I do it to myself, I always tend to find something that I KNOW no body else likes, and then take heart to it. Just like Anime. as soon as it became popular, I dropped it and while I still like it, I rarely watch it. Gah... -_- At least I know most of you have better things to complain about, but I crave that social togetherness I had down there. Not to say I am unhappy up here, cause I am happy. But I still miss it.

[Fayde]

Now that I'm done complaining, I've been up to some interesting things.

I'm on "spring break", which actually sucks cause I have to work a lot.

Anywho, MELI AND I ARE GOING TO SAKURA-CON IN SEATTLE NEXT WEEK!!!!!! WOOOOOOT!
No really, we are. I'm skipping out on school friday (do it while your young?), and we're going over there Thursday afternoon. It kicks off on Friday morning. We'll be there Friday-Sunday morning. We'll be back in time for school on Monday. Last year was just as big as AX02 (when we went), and it seems like it'll be even bigger this year. We're pretty excited. This'll be Meli's first Con, and only my second. It'll be awesome, and of course, I'll post tons of pics!

I've also been designing a board game version of Sins of a Solar Empire (express version though). It's coming along nicely, except for one thing. They way I designed it, it'll require over 120 dice to play! Each dice (of different colors) represent different classes of ships, and have a "to-hit" number. It is a pretty short game to play too, from what I've played so far (about 30-45 minutes), but man... Anything over a two player game requires more dice than I have. Of course it's complete with the different races (with their specific advantages/styles), and Star Bases.
I made it with the thought of playing it with my kids so I could experience SoaSE with my kids, and to have a fairly light, quick game to play at work, rather than the typical 3-5 hours we spend on a single game...
Why did I make such a vast, deep PC game into something tiny and simple? Because SoaSE works at so many different scales, and it would be nice to play something so deep in such a small amount of time.
So far though, I am really happy with it, and it only took me a couple hours to design! I'll post pics once I have it totally ready.

Lastly, I've been of course playing SoaSE like a science. I haven't felt this dedicated toward a game since StarCraft! I can't seem to get enough. I swear I go to bed zooming in and out of my massive armada pushing through enemy fleets only to be stopped by a Star Base with 300,000 Hull points and 500,000 Shield points........ And then watch my huge fleet that I spent 3 hours building and hundreds of thousands of credits on... *cries*

Also, I watched Battlestar Galactica (the original), which was AWESOME. I have Tron to watch next.

Oh, and somewhere in there I've been spending lots of time with Meli! We've also been watching Star Trek Next Generation! I never thought I'd be watching Star Trek with my wife, and having her enjoy it too! I'm pretty darn lucky. Nothing's better than your wife watching totally nerdy shows with your and laughing at totally nerdy jokes. Makes a grown man cry. ^^;

OH OH!! And today is Meli and my UNOFFICIAL anniversary. Today (March 25th) marks the day we started talking online 7 YEARS AGO!!! WHOA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[itsallgood]

Hope you guys have fun at the convention. Yes definately do it while you are young and free of responsibilities. No drinking or anything. You need to start a new thread, btw with the up and coming subject. ;D Congrats on the anniversary! love you both

[Waspman]

Awesome! How long does it take to drive to Seattle, anyway?
I always wanted to go to another con, since my "power levels" have increased substantially since the last time we went. In fact, you could say I've gone "Super Saiyan" or achieved "Bankai." Which is actually a sad thing because it means I have no life.. but I'd think it'd be a different experience if one knew all there is to know about everything at the con, as opposed to someone who was just casually into anime and games and didn't know what everyone was cosplaying as, or what merchandise was for, etc. I guess I'm just interested in seeing the difference. Well, I hope you guys have fun!

Man, I loved Star Trek Next Generation. Used to watch it back when it was actually still airing with new episodes. Wasn't a big fan of the original Star Trek series, probably because it was so campy/low budget, but I love the original movies. Wraith of Khan, Undiscovered Country, etc.

Truth be told, I actually knew what the big news was before you even said anything. I thought it was strange to be calling on a Friday, at that time at night. I knew it had to be something major.. first I thought maybe someone passed away but your voice seemed ecstatic so I knew right then and there what it was. But honestly, it freaked me out.. actually it still freaks me out and I seriously got no sleep last night after you told me. I mean, in of itself it's not surprising at all nor should it be.. but holy freaking crap, it makes me realize how freaking old I really am. I feel like I'm dying, not even joking. In just a few years I'm going to be thirty years old.. and I haven't accomplished anything.. ugh.. of course, it doesn't help that I was randomly passing out for the past two or three years. I've lost so much time because of that crap..
..BUT ANYWAY. I definitely appreciate you calling and I definitely want to know how things are going in the upcoming months.

[Fayde]

Seattle is about 6 hours away (making good time and not stopping to eat or anything). I was actually thinking next year you guys could come up for it, since we probably wouldn't have to have a hotel or anything, it'd be the fee of getting in and that's it. It's going to be fun though, I'll take tons and TONS of pictures for everyone so you guys can see it. But yeah, I've been wanting to go to this for a while (since I've been up here) but never got to go. We really shouldn't as far as money goes, but a "do it while your young" idea says "LETS DO IT! ANYWAY!"

Lol... super saiyan of anime... Sadly, I've never been MORE out of anime than I am now, yet I am going. There IS however a world premier of the new Trigun movie that will be playing! I'm glad I know one of the names of the movies they'll be showing!

Yeah, I used to love it when it was coming out too, and I have 3 of the original movies as well, but I didn't like the very first original movie... It was really long and strung out. The story was good, but it could have been 45 minutes shorter. Meli loves Next Gen now too, and has a crush on Data... Not sure how I feel about that lol. After every episode, Meli has to say "Data's so hot!" or something of the like.

Anyway, yeah, honestly I still can't believe it... I'm WAY to young to be a dad. Not physically in age, but mentally. I still feel like I'm 18 for crying out loud! However, I did talk with and re-visit with Meli last night about expectations and how things are going to change/not change. She was really helpful in saying that I don't have to change at all, and that she wants our SON (better not be a girl, lol) to grow up with me being who I am now. Which made me feel better, cause I instantly felt like I had to grow up and "be a man" or whatever.
I'm still the same person. Although I have a new member of my family coming in, I'm not all shut out like it seems most new dads are now days. I don't see it as life changing as some people do. Life does not have to stop when you have a child. You're life DOES change, but I don't think I will as much as people think, because I'm already there... If that makes any sense... who knows though.
As for feeling old, I totally understand. It took a long time for me to really try to do something with myself, but once I did, I felt so much better. I think a problem for you though is, you don't have much close family that you get along with (unless I am mistaken), so you have little or no support, which in my case was extremely needed. The passing out stuff was awful and took a huge chunk of your life away, but I say then "get it back". It's never to late to change things or do things you never did before. I know a few people in school right now who "wasted" the first 45 years of their lives in empty relationships, dead end jobs and wasteful life styles, only to end up in school, graduate and start over with a good job, a new life and new friends. Although I am not saying your life style is wasteful (if you consider the fact that you play games and watch anime), you do have a lot of potential to learn and grow. It's the hardest thing in the world is to find it in yourself to do it though. I know this from experience. If it wasn't for Meli, I'd probably still be working at Denny's, maybe in a management position, living by my self, and doing nothing. Although that sounds awesome sometimes (especially when I'm in school lol) but I regret having never gone to school back in the day when I could have. (not to say you have to go to school for everything to come into focus lol)
Lastly, you don't have to have kids, a wife and a good job to have meaning in your life, or for your life to go somewhere. Sadly, most people I've met (albeit because of my job) with wives, kids and a good job are the most unhappy, screwed up and mean people.

You sounded freaked out though, and I was actually worried you were somehow mad at me (and I could understand that actually). I appreciate your honesty though, makes me feel better.
You're not as old as you think you are though. I know it's stupid and cheesy, but being young at heart is WAY better than being young in body.

Finally, if you think about it, you could go to school (I personally don't pay a dime, grants and the government pay for all of it) and graduate in 3 or 4 years with a degree in Computer Science or something. I won't lie to you about pre-reqs, in that you'll start from the bottom like I did. But the actual degree takes only two years, and pre-reqs only take another 2 years, depending on where you are in book-knowledge. Taking a couple classes a day at Pima or something would be pretty simple. And again, you probably won't have to pay for a dime of it until you actually graduate and get a job in the field. You'll be there by the time your 30. I could help you out with it too if you want. Just think about it. ^^

Anyway, sorry for rambling! Hope you're doing well, I'll probably call you tonight about playing SoaSE!

[Waspman]

A lot of people actually weren't too fond of the first Star Trek movie either. I dunno if it's for the same reasons or what. I've only watched the first one once and I didn't think it was too bad, but it was definitely too long. The Star Trek movie I'm not really fond of is the one where they time travel and try to save that Whale. I guess I just wasn't too fond of the story. Which movies do you own, BTW?

I definetly think you'll be a good father. For one thing, I know you're great with kids. Heck, you work with them! It'll definitely be a challenge, though. Oh god, I can't even imagine.

BTW, I was never mad. Just freaked out, which I've gotten over for the most part. (Although I still feel old) There should be NO reason anyone should be mad about it, I don't care if they're family or otherwise. Freaked out or a little scared? Sure. Mad? No.
It's not like you had a one night stand with some random chick and got her pregnant, or something. And even if you did, IT'S YOUR LIFE! Besides, you guys are plenty old and capable enough. Heck, just look at all the 18 year old kids OR YOUNGER who are having kids of their own.

[itsallgood]

Ok, I've kept my mouth shut long enough-yes, since yesterday after Josh's reply till now is a long time for me, as you know, lol.

Josh, sweetheart, darling, you WILL change, so will your wife. How you guys change will be up to you both. The entire world now revolves around a tiny being 100% dependant on you. It's no longer about you. It's soooooo scary! But you will both change and you will be a wonderful father and she will be a wonderful mother and that baby is going to be the luckiest child to have you both. Usually what happens with relationships is the guy will get jealous that mom is spending so much time with the baby, and mom will get upset that dad isn't attentive enough to HER needs. You two have been married a while and have a good strong basis and you are both very muture and though problems will arise, you will work through them. But, you will change, and you will like it, though it's scary. I know you forget, or maybe I'm not the mom I wish I was, but I am here for you. And for Mel.

Jay-I understand how you feel, to a point anyway. I live in a world of depression and not feeling like I am good enough and wonder why I am here, and what impact am I making, etc, etc. With the baby coming, I now have something to look forward to, but I have been doing some soul serching lately and when it comes down to it, I can't live for someone else or live because of someone else, I need to live for me. I am 44 and still trying to figure this out. Josh is right in that you need to figure out what kind of career you would like to get into. Denny's is a deadend job. When you were in the hospital you mentioned doing something about educating others about your condition. (Well, the condition you no longer have) Maybe you could volunteer at a center for something similar. Maybe you could start writing online about it. When it comes to a job, you could try OneStop career center. They do testing and stuff to help you discover where you may want to work. They can also direct you to the right kind of funding or training you might need. Watch out for career days at the TCC, they happen now and then and I believe admission is free. Also, just start looking in the paper or online to see what's out there and what the job requires, etc. Just for ideas. On a personal level, have you ever gone to a bar or club? It would be a good experience. I will have to take you sometime. I go to bed early as you know, and I know you have work on Sat and Sun mornings so that might just work out if I take you. I usually go for happy hour, and the wild women aren't really roaming yet, but it would at least give you another experience under your belt. The more you do, the more places you go, the more you grow as a person and the easier it is to talk to people and feel confident. Then, one day maybe you can ask a lady out and if she wanted to go to a club you wouldn't be a club virgin. Just a thought. I am here for you, too, you know.

love you all very much